I suppose it's being anxious about the home improvements being made. The house is in disarray and it's stressing me a little. I am off tomorrow and I think I will get some stuff caught up then. I kind of piddled around to day and didn't really do much. Went for a long ride. Thought about the up coming lenten season and what I was going to give up and take on. I need to really think about that in the next couple of days.
Feeling anxious about my job and what is to come. Me, teaching things that are outside my comfort zone. If I can't teach art I always said I wouldn't be a teacher. Reality, time off...benefits...steady work...I really couldn't beat it and I need to just simply be thankful that I have a job.
I was feeling a little regretful of things I had done. Things that I had said. Things I can never undo. I need to let it go. I usually can but today I had a day of wallowing. I was angry today. Angry at HIM, angry at her (my mother). Both for leaving me. I have a hard time getting close to someone. I need to work on being a better friend, letting myself be vulnerable. That's hugely frightening. I've come sooo far. Sooo far. I can keep going.
No comments:
Post a Comment