Kidney stones..

Yesterday i went to the emergency room at 5 am with the worst pain I had ever felt. I had noone to take me there, no one to care for me, but I had people call from work to check on me. That small thing made me feel a million times better. I will bet they don't even know that. So yeah, it was kidney stones. I feel much better today but stayed home just in case the pain was being masked by the great drugs they gave. I slept all day yesterday and all through the night. I don't know if I passed the thing yet or not. My back is still a little tender but that might also be PMS. Anyhoo, I don't want to ever go through that again. NEVER. My self diagnosis was too much exercise and not enough water intake. That will change. The water intake, not the exercise.

New stuff...

Last week i joined a gym with Jules and had my 5th water aerobics class today. OMG, it feels good both physically and mentally. Plus, I can eat more and not gain any weight. ALways important.

I am also going to look into the yoga and weight training.

Oh, I ran into an old "friend" of ours at the gym tonight. It is a girl who is friends with the girl (K) who introduced Mike to Gina. They all know each other. I hadn't seen her in about a year and a half. The guy who is handling our divorce also handled hers. It was awkward. She asked how I was, and I said fine. I went ahead and pointed out the big white elephant after a few moments of tippie toeng around it and said Well, I guess you heard about Mike and I. She had. No doubt about that with the gossip machines that mike's friends are. I am sure K told her about my psychotic episode of the phone calls to mIke the night Gina answered his phone on his birthday. Then she asked if I got the house...Uh, yeah, the house is MINE. Always has been but only recently official. Sure, like after four years of him not working and paying for his law school, bar exams, this that and the other thing, no fucking way does he get any part of what has been mine. He's already taken enough.


Yeah, that is about it. Things are rather slow and content lately. Guess that is good.

Today...

It has finally rained. I haven't cut my grass in about a month because it hasn't grown and also because if I had cut it, it would have all turned brown. Today there was a freshness in the air that hasn't been there for months. Today it smelled green even if it was ever so slight. I have a fire pit that I would love to be able to use this fall but there is no way I can if it continues to be so dry. I have so much to burn. so much.

I bought some beautiful brown pumps yesterday. They look like dance shoes...kind of old fashioned with a brown suede flower on the side of them. Remember Stevie Nick's video of Gypsy? That is what they remind me of, that era in the video. 30s? 40s? And oh my god are they comfy. A heel that I can actually wear.

Thankfulness...and knee sock tradition

Today i am thankful for
A wonderful new boss and a great job
A home to live in and personal financial stability.
Wine...Cabernet
Good friends
Nice clothes (shuddup, I am allowed a shallow moment)
Art, creating and looking at beautiful works
solitude (for now it is nice)
feeling better and stronger

Knee socks (and it is part of my thankfulness). Yesterday I went to Target looking for a skirt. Couldn't find what I had in mind BUT I found beautiful knee socks in argyle patterns, angora, over the knee styles AND legwarmers. Right before Xmess when things were going sour with talks of moving out, I went to my sister's house for brunch. Afterwards, my other sister Rox and I decided to hang out and go window shopping for furniture and she wanted to run to TJ MAx for something. The winter was not hugely cold, but colder for me than usual (stress maybe?) especially my feet and legs. I was elated to find some knee socks and spent about 50 bucks on all kinds of warm and fuzzy socks (yeah, I know, silly). Strange how incredibly comforting the socks were throughout the winter. People have comfort foods...I have comfort socks. About the leg warmers for anyone who is reading...don't worry, they will not be shown. I figure some leg warmers will be better looking under my pants than a pair of thermals, paired with a sweat pant and looking like the michelin man. I couldn't quite come to grips with buying these things in 96 degree weather, but they will be mine. Oh yes, they will. All the fuzzy bright warm knee socks lined carefully in my drawer.

Another long dry weekend...

Today was 90 something degrees and will be for the next few days making this the hottest year on record. Did I mention that already? did I mention how badly I would like to see rain and how sad and pathetic my dead yard looks? This weekend was a lonely one. I did not see SO because he was not feeling well and was bogged down with work. I am feeling a little insecure but resisted emotional dialing of anyone except for Julie. Really I only called her because I was concerned that I hadn't heard from her in a while and I know she has a really old and ill cat. I was afraid the cat had passed but Julie says she is doing fine. We're supposed to get together at the Pub tomorrow for some trivia. I am looking forward to the time I spend with her. A good female friend comes around so rarely.

Roxanne and Katie stopped by. Katie is going off to school on the 16th. I can't believe she is that old. I still remember her as a little preemie and then as a tiny independent and sensitive toddler who was wise beyond her years. She is a beautiful girl. Both she and her sister are works of art in and of themselves and no, I am not biased. They simply are. I consider them two of the most beautiful young women I have ever seen, topping Sade, Halle Barry, and Selma Hyak.

That is about it. It is late and I have to be ready for school tomorrow. At least I went and prepared a little today. I love having a key and access to the building anytime I want. It makes for a much less stressful work schedule.

Art books and sheets...

Yesterday I went to the book store and finally bought a book that I had been eyeing since before christmas called Fashion Illustration next. Lovely eye candy that combines beautiful art and models with fashion (duh) Most is photoshop stuff but it is also painting, collage, and drawing. It made me happy to finally have it.

I also bought a couple of other books that were bargain little art books. One is on surrealism and the other is fairies and angels in art. I love the Fairies and angels one because of the painting style....The rich flesh tones and the beauty of the female form of the pre-rafaelites and symbolists. YUM! YUM! YUM! The visual stimulation sparks my own wants to create art. I am thinking of painting my doors in the house. Why not? They're those hideous core doors and I am going to be living here for a long time so why even think about resale value right now? Besides, paint is the easiest thing to fix.

I have a hole in my comforter and my flannel sheets are incredibly thread bare and ugly with their faded rose colour and patched holes. Still, they're comfortable like an old flannel shirt should be. I think for my next pay check I am going to splurge on some sheets and a new, more contemporary bed spread/coverlet. I almost bought a striped one that has red on the back so it is reversable, but SO has one just like it (only yellow on the back). I didn't want him to think I was copying him. We have really similar tastes though. still, I really am not crazy about stripes. If I could find something all cotton in a diamond or square pattern I would be happy. I did see a beautiful satin cover but it was...SATIN and not cotton. It had a really nice concentric square design.

I will find something I like. If not, I can hold out a little longer.