Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Ugh. Hormones...

I am sitting here feeling blah and not even being able to figure out if I am happy or not. I am feeling flighty, nervous, jumpy, angry, weepy, etc. This is a reminder to myself that I am not crazy, I am not going crazy, that I go through this every fucking month and WHY CAN'T YOU RECOGNIZE THAT???? Oy. No, I take that back...If when a person questions their sanity, that is a sign that they are indeed, NOT crazy, then I must be temporarily insane every month (some worse than others) when I am in the midst of my whatever you wanna call it and I can't figure out what is wrong with me. I am lucky if I have a moment of clarity (like now) that I can talk myself down from the ledge of insanity, but many times I don't recognize the issue until it is too late. Come to think of it, I wonder if last year when I became insane with Mike, if I was in a "state".

I spent 200 bucks on a water heater today. If I were a guy, I probably would have been able to fix it myself. Yeah, shut up! I am the stereotypical girl when it comes to this kind of stuff. I get thrilled to death when I do anything remotely "manly" such as the yard work or filling my tank up with gas even. Isn't that a hoot considering when I was a kid I never felt fem.

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